When I was a little boy, I used to play with little rocket toys, I used to build rocket Erector sets, And fly bottle rockets with my friends, In two years they'll send me to space, And I'll land on Mars in 300 days, My name is Astronaut Todd, I'll be the first person on Mars. Maybe I'll see E.T., Or Buzz Lightyear flying next to me, Maybe I'll see Major Tom, From the David Bowie song. Years from today I'll be floating in space, And the stars will all line up and spell my name. You're going to be a hero, Astronaut Todd. Sign autographs. Do photoshoots. The cover of Time magazine. But the greatest thing you'll get from all this will be a better understanding of our universe. (I know I like to act the part of being tough, I crumble like a sugarcube for you) It will take time for you to reach the stars, But remember time doesn't wait for you. Years will have gone when you touch down on Mars, And there will still be six planets nobody has been to.

My girl, she hates me, and if I were my girl, I think I would hate me, too, I would ignore it, but, ooh, I just adore it, If I'm the rubber, she's the glue, I've paid my dues, and I ain't got much to lose, Now that I have gone and lit her fuse, My neighbors hate me, and if I were my neighbors, I would hate me, too. She says: "This is egregious, and I don't agree with it, Outer space doesn't need any more stars." There's the old adage that goes, "cry when you need to, And laugh, laugh while you can," If life gave me lemons, I'd only make lemonade if, Life gave me a lemonade stand, I've got no manners, and everybody tells me that, The manners make the man, I often cry even when I do not need to, And I never laugh even when I can. She says: "Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider, Outer space doesn't need any more stars." I've been to college, and I've got some knowledge. My girl she hates me, and if I were my girl, I think I would hate me, too.

Woah oh, it glitters, it's gold, I am the ice cream, and you are the cone, Woah oh, what do you know? I am the stocking, and you are the coal. Woah oh, it glitters, it's gold, You are the traffic, and I am the road, Woah oh, what do you know? I'm an encryption, and you cracked the code. I want to be on magazine covers, I want to be on magazine covers, I was the loneliest boy, Now I'm a star in the eyes of the Lord, Over the ramparts you'll watch, As the rocket I'm in flies into the sun. I think for me it is now or never, For my whole life I've felt under the weather, Now it's 300 degrees, I don't trust you, and you sure don't trust me, But it don't matter anyhow, Because all of America will stand up and shout my name. I just want to float, I just want to float, I just want to float over the clouds. Didn't even know, I didn't even know, I didn't even know that the Earth was round. Man's gonna make it to Mars, My flight will be broadcast live on NPR, You shake your head, but you'll see, When I alter the shape of the galaxy. Miles and miles and miles away, Beyond the solar system and the solar rays, Lies Andromeda galaxy light years away, Lies two and a half light years from the Milky Way, And then one day human life will cease to exist, And one day the Red Planet will stop being red, And the magazines will all decay in the dirt, But my name will be remembered by the universe. Woah oh, it glitters, it's gold, I am the shower, and you are the mold, Woah oh, look at them go, You are a loan shark, and I am the loan. Woah oh, it's for sale, it's sold, I am the glass house and you are the stone, Woah oh, what do you know? I am the "maybe," and you are the "no."

She's the moon on Fridays, On Saturdays she is the stars, Let's just not talk about Sundays, That's when she takes things too far, She pulls me in with all her might, Chews me up, twists me, and turns, And spits me out empty-handed, With cuts and bruises and third-degree burns. She's a black hole in my universe, She's a black hole in my universe, She's a black hole in my universe, And I'm scared. (x2) Again and again. Then on Mondays she's tired, On Tuesdays she is fired up, On Wednesdays she is a comet, On Thursdays she becomes the sun, Still nothing's worse than a Sunday, She takes me and tears me apart, Into another dimension, Where she pulls on the strings of my heart She's a black hole in my universe, She's a black hole in my universe, She's a black hole in my universe, And I'm scared. (x2) Again and again. She's a black hole in my universe, She's a black hole in my universe, She's a black hole in my universe, And I'm scared. (x2) Again and again.

I looked in your dreams and your nightmares too and, My mind expanded when I heard your record, I read the lyrics, I read every word, I heard the sounds, sounds like I'd never heard. I do like to read your philosophy. (x4) I stole your wardrobe and all your expressions and, I made a song, sounded like an impression, I spoke about you to my friends incessantly, You saved the nation from a great depression. I do like to read your philosophy. (x4) I cracked the code on your theology, And I memorized each word of your biography, And I am one to propagate your mythology, But all I really know is your discography. I do like to read your philosophy. (x8)

Every season we say, The weather's getting weird in some way, But to me it's always the same. I left a message that read, The phone is off the hook, but the line's dead, But I won't stay if I don't want to stay. I know it seems egregious, And I know that you don't want me to leave, But I know that I must do this, For the Red Planet is beckoning me, I should have told you this, Before we settled down in Jersey, But I know I must pursue this, My career is most important to me, I'm on my knee's and begging, For you to wait a few years for me, To come home from my journey, A better man than I used to be, Cause outer space will change me, The emptiness and the gravity, Will knock me off my feet and, Make me a better person than I used to be. You said, "Don't ever leave, don't ever leave, Don't ever leave, don't ever leave the atmosphere. Don't leave your wife and kids, And take a rocket ship out of here." You were my could have been, my would have been, My should have been, I should have been there for you, Now you're a battle scar, And the salt in my wounds.

Man shot into the moon, The stars will come out real soon, Launch site, ready for countdown, In space, will I hear the sound, Of your voice inside my head, Or will I hear nothing? Will I make it past the moon, before feeling lonely? The engines cut off, Mission control, Will I float up here, Until I am old? Mouth shut, we're breaking up, Boosters about to erupt, I got to leave your world, You were my solar girl, Will the gravity mess with me, And the waves in the ocean? I think you married me, With the preconceived notion, That I want to settle down, But you should have known, Will my breath cut short? Or will this rocket explode?

Blue dot, red sky, Planet Earth tells me I'm gonna die, Red sun, red ground, I wish I could show you around, I got a red carpet in my pocket, That's itching to be walked on, Red house, red tape, I spilled red ink all over the place. Oh, Lordy, Lordy, Lordy, I went right and was wrong, I wanna go back to New Jersey now, I wanna go back to my home, Oh, Lordy, Lordy, Lordy, I can see it in your eyes, And I can see it in your smile, And I can feel it in the sky. And I know you can't hear me, And that you're so far away, But I'd be lying if I said that, I didn't make a mistake, Now I'm stuck on the Red Planet, My rocket can't be repaired, And I can say for certain, That soon I'll run out of air. I'm jammin' in Jamaica, mon, And the sky is unusually red, I'm partying at Mardi Gras, While I lose the hair on my head, I wouldn't call it paradise, If it's lost, and it's never found, I'm stuck inside Olympus Mons, Where my rocket ship barreled down. Oh, Lordy, Lordy, Lordy, I went right and was wrong, I wanna go back to New Jersey now, I wanna go back to my home, Oh, Lordy, Lordy, Lordy, I can see it in your eyes, And I can see it in your smile, And I can feel it in the sky. And now it's almost the morning, And I still haven't slept, I thought the stars had aligned for me, And this is all that I get, If I held up a mirror, To the Earth from Mars, I think I'd see your reflection, Amongst an ocean of stars. Oh, Lordy, Lordy, Lordy, I went right and was wrong, I wanna go back to New Jersey now, I wanna go back to my home, Oh, Lordy, Lordy, Lordy, I can see it in your eyes, And I can see it in your smile, And I can feel it in the sky. I'm jammin' in Jamaica, man. (x2)

I breathed my last breath of air, (and I'm fighting it, fighting it) The sky is on fire, and I can't bear, (To fly in it, fly in it) The door was open, so I stepped inside my dream, I laughed. then I cursed, then I dreamed another dream, I was the loneliest boy two worlds had ever seen, Now I lay in the red sand and dream a different dream. I see you walking down Penn Ave, "Mr. President, I'm here to shake your hand," 21 gun salute to the fallen king, That's one wreck that I won't be rubbernecking. I slept through July closing my eyes up in the sky, (up at the sky) It's hard, hard not to sigh knowing that I wasted my time, I wasted my time. (I wasted my time) I wasted my time. (I wasted my time) I wasted my time. (You wasted your time) I wasted my time. (You wasted your time) I don't even care, Cause I don't love you anymore, I don't even care, Cause I don't love you anymore. I made my choice between my wife, kids, and job, And now these are the last words of Astronaut Todd, Let us rejoice, point your hands to the stars, Knowing there lies the body of Astronaut Todd.